It's Friday Jan 24th and I’m currently in beautiful Crested Butte Colorado on a snowboard trip, but I can’t snowboard.

Two weeks ago I fractured my patella while trail running.
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(The macho man in me needs you to know that I ran 4 miles back after the incident occurred 😅).
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The short version is while on a technical section my toe got caught on a rock and I fell “knee first” into a big boulder.

Direct impact created quite the pain as I smashed into the rock.
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I was a little nervous since there’s no muscle surrounding the kneecap.

Adrenaline allowed me to keep moving (plus I didn’t have another option to get back).

I had a cut and bruise show up immediately but didn’t think too much of it.

Later that night after a dinner date with my partner I was struggling to walk.

I took a few days off, but had to get back to training because I have a Hyrox race coming up February 2nd that I’ve been working toward for months.

After a big interval running workout, I knew things weren’t right. The pain and discomfort that night had me starting to fear for the worst.

While the pain was there I could have pushed through, but I didn’t want to make things worse long term if there was deeper damage.

I got an X ray and sure enough on Tuesday I got the news there’s an avulsion fracture of my patella.

Fast forward to today, I’m at the most quaint coffee shop in Crested Butte surrounded by the most magnificent moutnains.

This ski trip had been planned for months, and while I’m grateful to be in this beautiful place I’m also feeling sad, frustrated and disappointed.

The irony is I just finished reading the Surrender Experiment by Michale Singer.

I guess the universe thought I could put the lesson into action.

While it’s hard to deal with, I have found in life some of the biggest gifts come from injury, setbacks and ruined plan.

Simultaneously our greatest suffering comes from us being unwilling to accept the truth.

When we are at war with reality, we perpetuate our pain.

I could have not come on the trip or sulked the whole time I'm here, but that wouldn't have been fun for anyone.

With all the lessons over the years I’m really proud with how I’m handling this. My dad and girlfriend are still getting to ski and I’m making the most of this epic town.

Transparently it hasn't been perfect and I definitely have let my emotions get the best of me at times.

It's hard to not be able to do the things you want to.

I'm doing my best, and can keep correcting to choose something even better.

Choosing awe, wonder, joy and surprise over bitterness and upset.

No good will come from dwelling and playing the victim.

So I sit here drinking espresso and writing you this for two reasons:
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• Integration for myself. Surrender and acceptance is a continual process, not something you can check off the list. Writing has always been a great way to process things for me. I want create space to both feel and choose to trust something greater. It's helping me take aligned action into becoming a better man, partner, friend, son and coach.
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• I hope this can help you wherever you are. Remember that you have overcome EVERY hard thing that’s come into your life. Injuries, heartbreak, challenge fear, anxiety, etc. If you did it then, you can do it again. And I would bet in hindsight you even have some gratitude for those experiences.

So join me in the real world Surrender Experiment.

Accepting what is true in any given moment.

Feeling the upset of things not working out, but not fixating.

Choosing to do your best with what you’ve got, for where you are.

For me that looks like hitting send and taking a walk downtown soaking up the sunshine and mountain views.

Reveling in dinner with two people I love the most and creating memories that will last a lifetime.

Much love,
Taylor

Taylor Sleaford Life, Leadership & Men's Work Coach

↠ What do I do? I work 1:1 with Men & Women guiding them personally, spiritually and professionally to be their most authentic, loving and powerful self. I also lead group programs for men. Learn more HERE​

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